Category: Humor

Bitchen Corn Flakes

Two twin brothers John and Jake,  wake up on their 12th birthday.  John says “We’re grown ups now! We can curse like adults!” They go down for breakfast and their mom says happy birthday boys! What would my sons like for breakfast? John says “Ah just give me some of those son of bitchen corn […]

How to tell if a man’s shirt is ready for the laundry.

Men have a sophisticated system when it comes to their clothing. If a man wears a shirt for just one hour, he doesn’t want to toss it in the clothes hamper. I mean, it is practically clean! One hour worn! Men apply this same highly developed system to all levels of clothing cleanliness. Women on […]

Oreo Cookie Hell!

What the holy living beaver hell has happened to Oreo cookies!?  I have not purchased Oreos in some time. Maybe years. That is because I am a fat man trying to not be fatter. I have been trying to lose thirty pounds for the last thirty years. Anyway, once in a blue full May moon […]

Blonde Joke #3

One may have to ponder this one for a second… This story takes place back in the old days, when milk was delivered. A young blonde left a note for her milkman asking for 40 gallons of milk. Surprised, he knocked on the door and asked her if she really wanted 40 gallons. She replied […]

Two Old Veterans

Two very old war veterans were walking down a sidewalk toward each other, both of them dragging their right foot along the ground.  Neither of them was moving out of the way for the other, but they kept walking straight toward each other. Eventually they were right in front of each other, nose to nose! […]

IF YOU MARRY AN IRISH GIRL

Three friends got married:   The first man married a woman from Italy. He told her that she was to do the dishes, house cleaning, laundry and cooking. It took a couple of days, but on the third day, he came home to see a clean house and dishes washed and put away. The second […]

Which More Painful

Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the Nuts? Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the nuts. I was talking about this with my wife the other day. I maintained that a man being kicked in the balls is obviously more painful than […]

My Favorite Jokes

These jokes make me laugh. They might make you laugh. Or not. Some can be considered crude, others are not politically correct, so if you are sensitive in any way, consider this your trigger warning, If you do not have a sense of humor, please bug off. 50th Anniversary Blonde Joke Blonde Joke Bring me […]