Most people don’t get pulled over by the police for speeding very often. But sometimes it happens. I have a system that dramatically improves your chances of receiving a warning instead of a ticket. Or at least get a reduced offense listed. Granted, not speeding is really the first thing you can do. Then again, there are speed traps where the limit goes from 55MPH to 25MPH suddenly. Cities make a ton of money off of the traffic infraction fines. Anyway, here are my Fourteen Steps to Avoiding a Speeding Ticket or have the the citation reduced.
Step One: Be white. I can’t emphasize this enough. Every time I got pulled over being white was an advantage. So, if at all possible, try to be white.
Step Two: Put your turn signal on and pull over right away, finding a very safe area to stop so the police officer doesn’t have to stand along the road writing you the ticket. They appreciate that.
Step Three: Roll your front windows down and turn your car off.
Step Four: Get your driver’s license, registration and insurance card out. I always keep the registration and insurance card clipped together easily accessible in my glove box.
Step Five: Put your car keys on your dash board in plain sight. This let’s the police officer know you are not likely to speed off.
Step Six: Put both hands in plain sight on top of the steering wheel or even the dash. Have your driver’s license, registration and insurance card in your hands.
Step Seven: Remain calm and try to put a smile on your face. Greet the officer when he/she gets to your window.
Step Eight: Very important! When the officer arrives at your window, resist the urge to say, “I’ll like a Whopper, fries and a chocolate shake”. This is surprisingly not a time for humor.
Step Nine: Don’t start talking. Let the officer lead the conversation.
Step Ten: Don’t admit to anything!
Step Eleven: Do not whine. Do not argue. Do not deny wrongdoing. Do not beg. Be friendly and calm.
Step Twelve: If the officer offers you a warning, thank the officer profusely. Wish the officer a safe and good day.
Step Thirteen: Do not peel off and speed until you are out of the officer’s district.
Step Fourteen: Worth repeating, Try your best to be white.
-Dart